Happiness is a choice!

The Shame of Cancer & How Being Impetuous Saved My Life

Really? Stage 4+ lymphoma, one week to live? I am the healthy one, I actually prided myself in my poverty.  Yes, I was prideful that I was poor,  and I grew my own herbs and bought in bulk, capsuled them, and made my own vitamins. I had my children at home to save money and live naturally. We raised our beef and chickens, fresh eggs and organic beef and potatoes out of the field. Big garden and a variety of vegetables. I would process a whole deer right off the foothills into bottles.  We lived off the land, I was a hippy kind of farm girl. Pillar of health.  I swore that I would NEVER allow chemo in my body. If I could have a 10 lb baby at home and live off the land, I could beat cancer with natural remedies! Oh, the shame of “How can I face the world and admit that I have cancer? ” Just pure embarrassment. I started using oils and herbs that would fight cancer. I am confident that this prolonged my life by a few weeks. But it was no match for this fast-growing cancer. My first thoughts were that I would just die

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What is “Real” at Christmas?

I felt so numb. My legs felt like wood. I am Christmas Carol. That is what my mom called me! But she is an angel in heaven and I think she is pretty busy. ( my mom painted these figuriness and notice the book says Christmas Carols, Yes that is about me:)               I would take pictures of off the kids in front of the Christmas tree. Yes, Tex is an angel in heaven and he wasn’t feeling the Christmas spirit that during this picture, maybe because the lump of coal in his stocking was mentioned 100 times a day!   Then I remember the Christmas I was exhausted and drank hot cocoa and watched movies as my children visited their father and we started a “new normal” Divorced parents after 25 years of marriage. Ya, that was a memorable Christmas.   Just 2 years ago I was pretty sure it was my last Christmas because of a life-changing cancer experience.    But now I am here to face these memories, and my heart, legs and mind just wasn’t sure what to do. This is the 1st time in a very long time that I was

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Impetuous

Being impetuous can get you in trouble even when you don’t mean to! When I am quiet you know that something is wrong. My words may be quiet but my mind isn’t. By nature, impetuous is where I am at. I am reasoning within myself and talking myself out of being hasty and impulsive. I know this story will be told at my funeral or will be brought up around the table before or after my funeral. I want the truth to be told. Because I have heard variations of it and this story about my impetuous nature! My middle son Tex was turning 8 right around Halloween. He is different from my other children. I wanted this to be an extra special birthday for him. In our religion 8 is the age for accountability and baptism. I planned for weeks to make this an incredible experience for all, and it will be memorable for all who attended or wish they had. I decorated the room with pictures of Tex, his violin was on display and family musical spiritual numbers were prepared by our family band, “The Elkington Fiddlers” I was at the piano. right by the door to the baptismal font. The

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So Shall We be Like a Tree

I planted a tree A tree that will last It will last my lifetime My children’s children will watch it grow It will see changes Changes in our home Changes in me Changes in our community It sees the big picture It will watch the  circle of life Death, birth, the storms of life It will stand through many seasons of life Spring-Fall, summer winter Stormes of life that will be unnoticed by the self-absorbed But the tree will see It will clean the air Clean the soul It will only give It will give protection to the home from the elements of snow, wind, and will give shade. It will bring the smell of pine from a wreath during the Holidays and welcome visitors It will give pine tea to the sick This tree will only give So shall we be like a tree Give new life Give new breath Give new perspective and stand strong and beautiful when the storms of life engulf us Stand firm and strong Bend in the wind Drink  up the rain and welcome the new day Look up Notice the sunshine  

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You may not need the hive, but the hive needs YOU

You may not need the hive, but the hive needs YOU I love you You are important I feel your heart  I feel your struggles   I cry for you Mourn for you  You are important You are a mighty bee   You may be one You may seem small You feel unnoticed You are missed    Your are needed You are the hive You are a fighter bee You are my honey   I will forever Bee YOUR mascot! To Class of 1982, Carol Cannon Sevy

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