When I look at successful families, one defining characteristic stands out: The children know how to work.
“I need a credit card,” As an 18-year-old man who is going to college in my community explains, I say,” You need to get a job and have income coming in, for someone to lend you money.” He comes back with, “But I need money so I can buy a car, so I can go to college and get a job.” I smile and explain, ”The bank isn’t going to just give you money because you’re going to college. You need to show that you can pay the money back.”
This is the story of too many college kids in my town. I hear this kind of conversation for college kids all the time. Somehow they made it to college without knowing the value of money. I often see many college students shop with their mom at the local Walmart at the beginning of the semester. She buys them items for their new apartment, rugs, decorations, plates, bowls, and their cart is heaping full. After they are settled and mom is gone, the students come back to Walmart returning most of the items. Yes, many are returning them, then putting their money together to buy the latest video games or whatever the craze may be. I’m sad to admit but I see this all the time.
To tell you the truth, I can buy I computer amazing price at the end of the semester when the college kids are poor and hungry. When the kids go back to college I go to the local thrift stores and stock up on home goods and decorations that are slightly used or still in their packages. These college students did not buy these items and therefore they have no idea what the value is.
But then again, I’ve seen the other side. I’ve seen college students who come here without any parent for support. They ride their bike to work or walk. I have even one particular young man ride his bike in the middle of winter in Rexburg, Idaho, across town, all hours of the day. Sometimes is 20 below zero and other time 3 feet of snow.
Where do these young adults get their work ethics? I don’t think it has anything to do with wealthy or poor. It has to do with learning to work and taking responsibility.
Confidence is made by being self-sufficient. At a young age children need to be taught that they can do hard things. When a child is 3 years old they can put away the silverware. I’ve always kept my place in a low cupboard for plates and bowls, so the younger children can unload the dishwasher.
As a young mother, I was always looking for ways for my children to money so they can have the responsibility and ability to care for themselves. It is best when they can acquire a skill that they can earn money for someone outside of the family. I believe that is the greatest gift we can give to our children. To be able to provide for themselves.
I knew at every as a young mother that my children would play instruments. I did everything I could that was legal to get them into piano and violin lessons. Because I am a pianist myself, I was able to learn to teach by taking my children to experience teachers. Watching, listening and being active in their learning. Isn’t it funny has how when we give, often we are returned with a greater gift? This gift of lessons and my commitment for them to learn, has given them the opportunity to be professional musicians and teachers. I knew in my heart this gift would always provide them with an income and something to fall back on. It has been true for 4 out of that my 5 children. Working and teaching music proficiently is a gift that I was able to provide through the grace of God.
I taught them to ride and train horses also. This is the gift that my own father gave me. I gave riding lessons and taught horse 4-h. All of my children are involved in music and horses. My youngest child was a very proficient violinist and ended up being the 2nd in the nation in fiddling. He has the gift of playing the violin. But he has taken that work ethic and has a full right scholarship for the rodeo. He is proficient in three events, team roping, calf tie-down, steer wrestling.
Letting my children handle money and letting them feel the loss of making a poor decision has given them the confidence to invest in projects that they can earn money.
It brings me great joy to see my grandchildren learning to train ponies, raised dogs and yes, clean up horse and dog manure, just as their parents did.
You don’t need to be on a farm to learn to work. Pray ask for direction to teach your children to work and in turn, they will teach their children to work. It is the greatest blessing to see my prosperity continuing the art of working.
Here they are working really hard, just like I taught them!
This is our Fiddling angle.
